QuietI's Weekly Roundup of Cool Stuff: The Way We Weren't

Long, really really long.
Spoilers abound. I haven't read or discussed this episode except in the most casual manner (as in, to say, "This is the single best episode of Farscape aired to date"), so if I re-tread an idea of yours it's because Great Minds Think
Alike.

Well, there, I gave up my opinion of the ep in the disclaimer section, but it bears repeating: This is the single best episode of Farscape aired to date. The depth of the storytelling, the masterful performances, the stunning direction and fx, all combined to produce a near-perfect episode.

I'm going to break with tradition and talk about Aeryn first. This was her episode, and Claudia Black's portrayal of our favorite ex-PK pilot was breathtaking. FINALLY we get some backstory on Aeryn! Our prayers have been answered, and how. But delving into Aeryn's past is never going to be pretty, because she was a product of PK society, and a functioning part of it. Chiana had it pegged, "What, all the other Peacekeepers were out doing the bad stuff while Aeryn stayed home?" (forgive the paraphrasing, but that was the essence of what she said) Realistically, we know that Aeryn has done a lot of horrible things in her past. We've been repressing that knowledge, choosing not to explore it, because we can see how much she has changed and grown in her time on Moya. But we have to face the reality now that Aeryn has a past, and it is far from pretty.

Now, I'm gonna say some stuff that I expect will have UCSBdad jumping all over me, but I think it needs to be said, nonetheless. When we see Aeryn in her relationship with Velorek, she's a typical PK. She is pissed at having been yanked off Prowler duty to fly cargo for this Tech guy. She has no problem with going to bed with him, and she can feel him tugging at her heart strings, but she won't let him in. That's a key point to observe. The only joy in her life to date has been in flying, and the idea that she could put her happiness in someone else's hands -- Velorek's -- and trust that somehow, he could make her feel as "fulfilled" as she felt while piloting -- is just too much for her to risk. The only person she relies on is herself. She doesn't want to believe Velorek's "You can be so much more," she's very safe and snug in her little PK world, and she doesn't want to change. In short, she is a coward. It's not her fault, she is the way she is because of the world she lived in, but she simply can't entertain any thoughts "outside the box." Why should she? She knows, with absolute certainty, what her life and career will be like. There's a huge amount of comfort, knowing the future like that. At that point in her life, no amount of emotional entanglement is going to outweigh that security.

Now, the scene in which she was part of the firing squad that executed Moya's First Pilot was horrifying to us, but to Aeryn *at the time* she was just following another order, it was no better or worse than any other order she had followed in the past. It is not her place to think, in this type of situation. The only thing she was thinking about was getting back to Prowler detail, it's the one thing that comes up over and over again throughout the flashbacks. So while her betrayal of Velorek was heartbreaking, it wasn't unexpected. Hey -- we *knew* she didn't go off with the guy, otherwise she wouldn't be on Moya now, right? Her defense of Crais and her uneasiness with Velorek's plan to stop Crais's project, in spite of Velorek's passionate denouncement of it, underscore just how much inside the PK box Aeryn was at that point. She had no capacity for critical thinking with respect to her superiors. She wasn't about to develop it at that point. Remember, at that point, Aeryn still viewed all non-Sebaceans as "inferior beings", and it was well beyond her to understand the sympathy and devotion that Velorek felt for Pilot and Moya. In fact, there's a good bet that Aeryn recognized Velorek as being "irreversibly contaminated," because he indeed was. So, in giving Velorek up to Crais, Aeryn was doing what she believed to be morally correct. In that respect, she was very brave. She did care for him, even if she did not love him the way he cared about her, and she obviously enjoyed her time with him. She knew what would happen to him, but she turned him in anyways, because it was the right thing to do. She ends up hurting, which surprised her... only after the fact did she realize how much she did care for Velorek. By then it was too late for regrets, and she gets back her plum assignment, the life she believes she should have.

Fast-forward to the present, and we have a very different Aeryn indeed. She has a profound respect for Pilot and loves Moya deeply as well. She has learned how much "more" she really is... but she had to be dragged, kicking and screaming, into this present. I recently re-watched the first few eps of S1. Aeryn is clearly determined to get OFF Moya in the Premiere, and spends a lot of time in the early eps un-learning all the prejudicial crap the PKs stuffed into her head. She fights as hard as she can to get back to her status quo, just as she behaved with Velorek. Only this time it doesn't work. Plus, this time, she still carries with her the seeds that Velorek planted. Those tiny, heretical ideas that Aeryn quickly repressed, but still plagued her subconscious from time to time. In the Premier, Aeryn clearly disobeys Crais's order to return, and she guns it to pursue Moya. That's how she ended up being the only one swept along by the starburst. I always wanted to know what motivated that, and now, we do. Whatever Aeryn was willing to admit consciously, she remembered being hurt aboard a Leviathan once, and there was no way she was going to let any Leviathan get away from *her*.

I used the word "repressed" there, and I think that's what we're seeing here with Aeryn. She says she didn't realize it was the same Leviathan, yet she passed Zhaan in the hall. She heard our Pilot speak with Velorek, she saw him several times (although often with the muzzle {shudder} on.) All the information was there for her to see, but she didn't *want* to know. [Of course, Pilot and Zhaan represented lesser beings at the point, so that's one theory as to why she didn't "notice" them.] Repression is a funny thing, your brain protects you when you're not looking. I always thought it was a junk theory until I experienced it myself. It's not conscious denial, you truly do not remember any of these things happening, until something triggers the memory -- and your brain decides you can handle it. Aeryn's response to being confronted with the recording was completely realistic. I've felt that stricken, punched-in-the-gut feeling myself. The scene with Aeryn pausing in the hallway, looking as if she's about to be sick, was perfect in conveying exactly what Aeryn's state was at that point. Wonderful, wonderful performance by Claudia in that tiny understated moment.

I was fascinated by the scenes between Aeryn and John, as he comforted her and led her into sharing her story with him. The discomfort level between them rose and fell, rose and fell. The scene with Aeryn in the gym, sobbing uncontrollably, was a tour-de-force for Claudia, the perfect counterpoint to that moment of nausea in the passageway. I got the impression that Aeryn was thinking these events through for the first time, and it wasn't easy for her. Her description of her past relationships as "painful" was interesting... her relationship with Velorek was not painful; it was the way she ended it that was. She herself stated that most PK relationships were never open, and never lasted very long. There was no emotional attachment, so why should they be painful? No, I think John's "empty" was a more accurate description of most PK relationships, whereas Aeryn's "painful" was reserved for her relationship with Velorek alone. John was very much in a supporting role in this episode, and he carried the part beautifully. He stood by Aeryn while the others were busy digesting the unpleasant truth, that Aeryn has a nasty past. He refused to let her give up or walk out without talking it all through, making HER understand what really happened then, and what is important now. As a side benefit, he got a huge glimpse into her past, and major doses of insight into how she feels about relationships in general. Oh, I was just *dying* in that final scene between the two of them, waiting for someone to say SOMETHING, "So, you say you loved this man?" Aeryn couldn't answer, but as usual, that in itself is an answer. The play of emotions across her face (and John's) was just amazing to watch. "What does it all mean?" we are left to wonder. Here's my take: Aeryn realizes NOW that she COULD have loved Velorek. Yes, she said they were lovers, she admitted she felt something that she would now call love. But at the time she wasn't willing to admit that to herself, to free herself from the PK box, and so she denied having those feelings. What she had with Velorek was enormous potential, but she short-circuited it. She never allowed that love to come into being. It's not "yes, I did" or "no, I didn't", it's some of each, and it's very difficult to talk about. That difficulty, that unwillingness to have to narrate all that for someone *else*, is what I think was behind Aeryn's silence in that scene. Poor John... what's it like for him, knowing that he reminds Aeryn of the only other man in her life to have made any inroads at all in her heart? You know what's cool, though? Unlike his overly-protective relationship with Chiana, John's relationship with Aeryn is firmly grounded in respect. He knows that Aeryn is fully capable of making her own decisions (especially with regard to relationships) and he doesn't push her for anything more than she's willing to give. The final flash-back scene as they are approaching the center chamber is a great example of this... John calmly but firmly makes Aeryn see that what she wants to do for Pilot, he wants to do for her. She is receptive to it because he isn't in her face about it. I love that respect between them... and it's very nice to see that all the goofiness of CDM didn't damage their relationship (at least, not for too long).

Aeryn's scenes with Pilot were heart-wrenching as well, the two of them were in so much pain. Both of them were guilty of betrayal, and were indirectly responsible for the deaths of beings who did not have to die. Pilot's angry reaction to the recording was understandable, but I knew immediately that Pilot was blaming himself a lot more than he blamed Aeryn. Aeryn was a convenient target for him to vent all that pent-up guilt at... but Pilot bears the brunt of the responsibility for the death of First Pilot. If he had not agreed to go with Velorek, First Pilot would not have been murdered. For three cycles now, Pilot has been in constant pain from his forced link with Moya. I expect he embraced that pain as a penance for the horror of his crimes. When he severed his link to her, he finally felt that justice would be done... Moya would be free of him, a usurper. He would die, because he deserved to die. As for the others, well, there's the transport pods and the Prowler and John's module... they'd be OK, sure. The redemption scene, in which Aeryn and John finally reach Pilot and Aeryn offers her life, is one of the finest moments you will ever see on television. They came in shooting because they have no choice, but they knew they couldn't solve their problems by force. Both Aeryn and Pilot must come to terms with their past, and make the decision to go on, in spite of it. Pilot's new, natural link to Moya, and the accompanying pain-free existence, are the physical manifestation that he is forgiven.

It's wonderful to get so much backstory on Pilot, too. Now we have a much better idea of why Pilot is so clueless about all things Leviathan. He was too young to be approved for joining, and like the typical teenager had no patience. Also like the typical teenager, he couldn't think beyond his own dream to be among the stars, and so had to live with the consequence of First Pilot's murder. Major kudos to showing us that ever-so-tiny glimpse of Pilot's homeworld. Now, three years later, he has matured but not much, most of his life aboard Moya has been enslaved to the PKs. What a life he chose! No wonder he adopted the servile attitude, it was his best defense against insanity. It was VERY cool to see Pilot's tendrils, and soooo creepy when Velorek pulled those innards out to start connecting Pilot up. The tech work with Pilot in this ep was absolutely outstanding! The puppetry and voice work both had me so caught up in the story, there was no question that Pilot isn't a real, living being. Lani Tupu, working overtime in this ep to bring us the truly demented Crais, was simply brilliant.

I have to say, that planet-side scene made me truly detest Velorek. He expertly manipulated a young creature for his own ends. How compelling the argument must have seemed to Pilot, "If you don't come, I'll find someone who will... the old Pilot is dead no matter what you decide." This was so clearly what our Pilot wanted to hear! For all his sympathies, Verolek was also a product of PK society, and he was not above using slimy methods to achieve his ends. Witness his torturing Moya into accepting our Pilot when she was awakened after the replacement. You want to talk about rape? Moya and her First Pilot had been joined for 21 cycles... she was Moya's life's mate, brutally murdered, and replaced with an ignorant, arrogant, upstart boy! Velorek clearly didn't want to kill her, so why did he try so hard to recruit our Pilot? If he had gone back to Crais and said, "There are no other Pilots willing to step in," then First Pilot would not have been killed, and Crais would've had to find another Leviathan for his breeding project. Instead, Velorek waffles in between wanting to save First Pilot and fulfilling his orders. Remark that he never told Pilot that he was going to be in constant pain once the link was achieved. He never told Pilot that Moya was wearing a control collar and that Pilot would be following PK orders for the rest of his life. Do you think if Pilot had all the facts up front, he would have decided as he did? When a few more cycles would have given him a chance to go before the Council of Elders, and earn a Leviathan by his own merits? Pilot STOLE Moya from her First Pilot! But Velorek never gave him an opportunity to think through all that, he only fed Pilot's dreams and stroked his vanity. After seeing that scene, and Velorek's subsequent treatment of Pilot (very much evocative of an abuser and his victim, btw), I came to the conclusion that Velorek and PK Aeryn deserved each other. Velorek is dead, and in all honesty I think he did deserve it, for allowing First Pilot to be murdered and for sentencing our Pilot to a life of painful servitude. I say he's dead because of Aeryn's "They never did get him to talk," statement, which I assume means he died before they could get him into an Aurora Chair. Or perhaps there was no chair available. For whatever reason, there is no way they were going to let Velorek live without getting that information out of him. One thing is certain, Velorek is certainly not worthy of our Aeryn now!

The remaining cast members were left with minor "shocked and dismayed" roles which they ably filled. Chiana, as the discoverer of the recording, was the least affected by it. Sure, it was horrible, but as she said, "What did you expect?" Clearly she didn't like it, but she wasn't about to get on Aeryn's case about it, *personally*. She did, however, show it to everyone else, which brings up the Big Question, Why? Why NOT take it to Aeryn herself, and ask her about it, how she wants to deal with it? There is some definite rivalry stuff going on between those two women, kind of a turf war. I do wonder when the cat fight between them will occur, I have the feeling it will in the not-to-distant future. But at any rate it seems that Chiana's intention was to turn the others against Aeryn, which she certainly did for a while there. Even after all they've been through, there are still those undercurrents of distrust (they all came to the surface in CDM.) I was lmao at Chiana beating up on Rygel for showing Pilot the recording. What Chiana did was far worse than what Rygel did. She found the recording, no one else had a clue it existed, she could've destroyed it. Label Chiana a capital-T TroubleMaker in this ep, with her only redeeming quality her common sense attitude about Aeryn's past.

Zhaan's scenes with Aeryn were both spectacular... Zhaan's disgust at the "murder of the helpless creature", and Aeryn immediately throwing back into her face that Zhaan lopped of Pilot's arm! And then, after Pilot tried to kill Aeryn and Zhaan is treating her bruises, Aeryn's confession ("You think I defile her with my presence... you're right.") shocks Zhaan into realizing that Aeryn can't be personally blamed for all that she did while she was a PK. She would never survive the crush of guilt that would descend upon her. Zhaan forgives Aeryn long before Aeryn is able to forgive herself.

D'Argo's was the smallest part in the ep, *sigh*. We did glimpse his youth a bit here, though, as we can see that he really doesn't quite no how to react to the recording. Clearly he recognizes Aeryn's real suffering when they confront her with it. It's horrifying to realize that this person you're living with was The Enemy for most of her life. But D'Argo also knows how much Aeryn has changed, and he wants to help -- I loved how he & John resorted to "rock, paper, scissors" to decide who would go after her. Little details like remind us that yes, these characters all do have memories. :)

Rygel, ah Rygel. "A dominar of integrity, as well as of action!" I haven't been on the bboard but I'm sure there is a growing population of 'Scapers who REALLY want to flush him out an air lock, now. You all know (or should know by now LOL) how I feel about Rygel. And however much you may hate him for showing Pilot that recording, it was, emphatically, The Right Thing To Do. It forced Pilot to confront his past, to confront Aeryn. To admit to them all how he came to be on Moya. And finally, it gave Pilot peace, and freedom. He has been forgiven, and his pain has been removed. Now he will move on to a complete and natural link with Moya, and none of that would've happened, if Rygel had not shown Pilot the recording. Was that Rygel's intent, to make things "right" with Pilot? I would guess that Rygel didn't give it too much thought beyond, "Pilot should know about this." I'll bet you a dozen Krispy Kremes that Rygel still feels really guilty about hacking off Pilot's arm. Zhaan was profusely apologetic at the time and tried to take Pilot's pain; D'Argo attempted to heal his relationship with Pilot with his shilquin. Only Rygel has yet to redeem himself over that nasty incident, and I'd bet that he saw this as a way to give something back to Pilot. Go ahead, blast away at my theories... you know I'm too stubborn to give up on my Dominar just yet. And in this particular case, I'll back him 100%. He did the right thing.

A final word about Crais. It was very interesting to see him, years before Tauvo's death, and to see that he was as nuts then as he is now. Still, there is brilliance there... who better than a farm boy to perform breeding experiments with the PK livestock, Leviathans? Lani's performance was just sooo awesome. I adored that look he gave Aeryn, "I assume you are the informant? Contact Lt Teeg..." The utter contempt in it was chilling. You know he wasn't disgusted by the fact she gave up a man who was her lover. He was disgusted by her tears, her second thoughts. Yes, this ruthless Crais is the one we will see again, I hope. He has what he always wanted: Talyn. It is even less surprising now that Talyn bonded with Crais... Crais is, in a sense, his father. Before, we knew about a generic "PK breeding program," but we didn't know that it was Crais's special project. I did wonder about why or how Crais knew so much about it before, and now all is clear. Very cool stuff, indeed.

Visuals were great in this ep, lots of PK leathers marching around, Aeryn & Velorek's scenes together, Pilot's "tendrils", Pilot's home world... the shot of Aeryn in the hangar, with all the activity and bustle around her, and Velorek walking up to meet her, and talk to her (highly evocative of SW:ANH, that scene w/Luke...)... the fade-outs between the present and the flashbacks...Pilot's rage! The "Shootout at the OK Corral" in Pilot's chamber between J&A and the DRDs... seeing Zhaan in her S1 sheer dress with that interesting neckline... another little glimpse into Zhaan's lab... First Pilot, her wonderful attitude and defense of Moya, refusing to cooperate with Crais's "project"... I know I'm leaving out tons of moments, but you get the idea. A solid 9 on the Eye Candy scale this week. And I hope everyone who has been worried about them slashing the f/x budget and having to "make do" will please stop worrying now.

So, where will this ep leave us? Pilot has "less complete" control over Moya than before, so that could land us in a bit of trouble at some point... for the next couple of seasons. It would be an easy hook for them to use, so we'll have to just hope it gets put to good use if they do bring it up again. Aeryn and John's relationship? John has just been given a lot to digest, but I have to say that, for him, things look hopeful. He may not see it that way, but it's true. Velorek planted some ideas back then, but they fell on an inflexible mind and were swept away. When John said to her, "You can be more," Aeryn really had no choice. It was change or die. Having chosen life, Aeryn now seems more capable of, and more receptive to, the idea of choosing love as well. She, too, has a lot to work through, to come to some sort of peace with herself. That's one of the beauties of this show, that we'll get to see her working her way through it... or at least, through some of it!

Many thanks, my deepest appreciation, to everyone involved in creating this episode.

Respectfully submitted,
Joan