n the mystical Empire of Izmer, the evil mage Profion (Irons) and his
chief henchman, Damodar (Bruce Payne), believe that the child Empress Savina
(Birch) wants to undermine their power. How? Savina believes that commoners
and mages alike should be treated equally--the very idea!
So Profion conspires to acquire magic scepters that will allow him to
control dragons, and thereby consolidate his grip on the Council of Mages.
Savina has a scepter which allows her to control gold dragons. Profion has
one, but it doesn't work very well. But the true power resides in the
mysterious Rod of Savrille, which would allow the bearer to master red
dragons.
Savina's mage mentor, Vildan Vildir (Edward Jewesbury), has a map that
shows the way to the Rod of Savrille, which has been lost. Profion
dispatches Damodar and his crimson soldiers to Izmer's Magic School to
steal the map from Vildir.
But Profion hasn't counted on the presence of the dashing thief Ridley
(Whalin) and his comic sidekick, Snails (Wayans), who have broken into the
school to steal treasures. When Damodar attacks Vildir, the mage gives the
map to his apprentice, Marina (McLellan). The thieves help Marina escape
the school with the precious map.
Marina persuades the reluctant thieves to join her, despite their
misgivings about helping a mage-in-training. They are joined by the
irascible dwarf Elwood Gutworthy (Lee Arenberg), who sees that there may be
a reward involved.
Ridley discovers one of the map's secrets, and leads the band to the Guild
of Thieves, where they may recover a magic stone, the Eye of the Dragon.
But Damodar isn't far behind. Can Marina and Ridley overcome their
differences to find the Rod before Profion? The future of the Empress--and
Izmer--hangs in the balance.
Two-dimensional as a trading card
Dungeons & Dragons is a labor of love for Courtney Solomon, a
30-year-old Canadian who makes his feature directorial debut with this
ambitious $36 million movie, backed by The Matrix producer Joel
Silver. So it seems almost curmudgeonly to say that D&D is awful on almost
every level. But it is, and it's unlikely anyone but the most fanatic
D&D gamers will see much to recommend in it.
The trouble starts with the amateurish script, which cribs from much better
movies, like Star Wars and Raiders of the Lost Ark. The script
relies much too heavily on conventions of the game, though the story, we
are told, is Solomon's own. The action stops dead every now and then for a
major character to provide exposition on why they must get this magic
scroll or negotiate that perilous maze. The quests seem arbitrary and
pointless.
The characters are as two-dimensional as game cards. In particular, Wayans'
character rivals Jar Jar Binks as an offensive squealing Stepin Fetchit
caricature. The dialogue is cringe-worthy. "Be prepared for a lesson in pain!" Damodar
growls at one point. Moreover, the jokes are so stale, not a single person
in a preview audience uttered so much as a chuckle.
Much attention went into the production design of the film, which was shot
in Prague. But the result is a curiously generic medieval European look
that has been done much better in scores of other films.
The actors don't help much. Birch is appealing but miscast; at one point,
she looks like she's going to topple off her shoes. The others mug more
than perform. Irons, normally a subtle and fascinating actor, is allowed to
run completely out of control, leering and gnashing his teeth, throwing his
arms out and howling like a madman. Only Lee Arenberg is mildly amusing as
the feculent dwarf.
About the only thing to like is the finale, in which airborne dragons
strafe Izmer. But even the artful visual effects feel wasted.
