s there a subgenre for scatological fantasy? Vulgarian sci-fi? Raunch-fest reverie? Meet Conker, the lewd beer-quaffing squirrel at the heart of Rare's titillating remake of its genre-busting Nintendo 64 title Conker's Bad Fur Day. With dollops of Xbox-accelerated razzmatazz and a 16-player Xbox Live multiplayer mode, Rare's hedonist rodent is back with (belching) bells on.
Conker the bar-hopping and lecherous squirrel has a miserable hangover, and the events that follow comprise Conker's "bad fur day," in which Conker must traverse a surreal fantasy-scape helping an adulterous king bee "pollinate" a double-D-cup sunflower, whizzing on dancing demons, storming the beaches of Normandy with a squad of screaming grey squirrels and finding new and creative ways to make cows defecate. By solving these and other puzzles, players bring Conker closer to his missing girlfriend (Berri) as well as the menacing milk-guzzling Panther King.
In addition to the solo game remake, the new multiplayer mode allows up to 16 players to battle in various "old" or "future" war arenas as members of either the SHC (Squirrel High Command) or the sinister Tediz. As players join the battlefield they must quickly achieve specific victory conditions (such as capturing an enemy flag, stealing enemy plans, capturing enemy towers, etc.) in order to win. Each side has several classes to choose from, which include a balance of lightweight, average or heavyweight attributes to accommodate different play styles and encourage team strategizing.
Both solo and multiplayer modes use similar control schemes, and movement is handled with the left thumbsick while firing a weapon, crouching, special abilities and weapon reloading are handled with the right-hand buttons. While solo play incorporates a context-sensitive item system (in which things like flamethrowers and slingshots are available only in specific areas), multiplayer mode pairs unique weapons like the sniper rifle ("Widowmaker") and the "Sinurator" (fires napalm and acid) with each class. A variety of secondary weapons (hacking devices, medguns, grenades) and mobile land and air vehicles are available in multiplayer only.
Pretty as well as pretty hard
Let's get one thing straight right away—this is not a game for young children, filled as it is with the same thematic material and bleep-a-thon boisterousness as South Park at its titter-inducing foulest. Bodies explode like pinatas, orifices emit various noxious substances, and bloody gobbets smack the camera with pyrotechnic aplomb. When Rare released this game on the Nintendo 64 in 2000, jaws were on the floor.
Fortunately most of the crude humor is deliciously intelligent and, dare I say, sophisticated, as keen to poke fun at itself as popular franchises like the Matrix or Godfather movies. While the remake is faithful to the original, Rare has completely overhauled the graphic engine, turning an already respectable game into one of the best-looking titles presently available for the Xbox. More than just a blocky albeit colorful rodent, Conker is now covered in thick scintillating fur, as is most everything else—the entire game, in fact, has a vibrant organic look to it that the original simply didn't have the processing oomph to render. If the game still has a few game design quirks (including a reliably irksome 3-D camera—my kingdom for a game that finally solves this abiding nag), they're generally pardonable beside the eye-smacking new visuals.
The main draw for Conker BFD aficionados, however, is going to be the new Xbox Live-enabled multiplayer, and it truly is a joy to behold—after much long and arduous practice, that is. If there's a problem with this remake, it's that multiplayer is so fast and furious that staying alive for more than a few seconds at a time is almost a virtue in itself for the first several hours. Thankfully, there's a handy "bot" mode in which players can simulate online play using "dumbots," as well as control their numbers and intelligence level. Another hitch is that it can be excessively difficult to determine whether one is actually hitting the enemy—the game could have used a better damage-feedback system. There's also something of a problem with balance between some of the classes, particularly Demolishers and Thermopiles, which are capable of dealing death on the battlefield more proficiently than the other classes.
Still, for great looks, mature (borderline offensive) rodent humor and reasonably refined multiplayer, it's hard to beat Conker: Live and Reloaded. With a solid 12- to 15-hour single-player campaign and an abundance of multiplayer goodness (after learning—and dying many times on—the ropes), this isn't a hard title to recommend. In a genre chock full of predictable themes, this is sui generis gaming indeed.
The jokes fall a bit flatter if you've played the original, but it still has some inimitable belly-laughing moments.
—Matt
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